Thursday, December 21, 2017

Christmas tree catastrophe

MY COUSIN, ROLAND Hart, lives in Zeeland, Michigan. He and his wife, Amy, have three awesome kids. The Zeeland Harts take Christmas very seriously and they get a real tree every year.

Christmas Chaos In Zeeland!
Amy woke up early Tuesday morning to discover the Christmas tree had toppled over and there was debris everywhere. The term "debris everywhere" is not used lightly. The photo of the carnage looks pretty bad. Roland managed to save the presents, which were already under the tree, which means they were getting ready for Christmas early.

I wonder about people who are organized during the chaos of Christmas (a great name for a band, Chaos of Christmas). It seems their 14-year-old daughter, Elly, is a snooper and they were forced to wrap the presents and get them under the tree before they were discovered.

"Actually, I think Elly is already wearing some of her presents because she found them early," Amy patiently explains.

Some precious family Christmas ornaments were damaged, but all is not lost. As Elly pointed out,
only half of the ornaments were hung this year (a sure sign the kids are getting older) and there's still a box in the basement with plenty of Christmas stuff.

Amy isn't sure how the tree toppled over. Could there be a Grinch loose in Zeeland knocking over trees? Has there been any paranormal activity lately in the house? Did the dog or cat get loose and cause Chaos Of Christmas?

Nope.

"I think we got a defective tree," Amy says.

Seems the Douglas Fir was a gift from a friend. There was a lot of water at the base of the tree. Amy didn't necessarily say this out loud, but all indications appear the tree may have collapsed under its own weight. A reconstruction team from the Department Of Christmas Chaos was headed to Zeeland late last night, but we haven't heard if they've made an official determination into the cause.

"Somebody told me it might be a squirrel, like the one in Christmas Vacation," Amy said.

Did I mention how much I love my cousin's wife?

Anyway, the presents were saved and the Chaos of Christmas continues in Zeeland. Yet to be determined is if a new tree will go up in the Hart house.

And if Elly is reading this, stop snooping! Your Christmas will be grand because you and your parents rock, with or without a tree.


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