Friday, September 11, 2020

It's an Election Year. Be careful out there.

POLITICS IS SERIOUS business. I get it. The upcoming election is huge. But some people involved in politics often lack a sense of humor. So if you are easily offended or if you think the election is already rigged or certain candidates are backed by aliens, stop reading right here. Or, have somebody read the rest of this blog to you, which I suspect might be the case anyway.

I am not a member of either party. I have opinions and I will vote. If you want to know my opinions, call me. But opinions are like assholes - everybody has one, nobody needs two, and they often smell. So save it if you want to comment on this and tell me how to vote or how wrong I am. 

This morning, Sheryl discovered a political bumper sticker on her car had been defaced. I will not tell you what it said. But it was written in marker. So some dirtball actually walked down our alley, saw the sticker, went home, got a marker and came back and wrote on the bumper sticker. Now THAT is dedication. Congrats, dirtball! You get the Dedicated DipWad Award! Lots of people in Calftown get it, so it's not that big of a deal.

I do have an opinion about people who deface political signs or cars, and people who steal signs. Now would be a good time to have the person reading this to you read very slowly so you understand every word - 

IT. IS. ILLEGAL.

There aren't enough Dedicated DipWad Awards out there to give you but the police would like to have a talk. Just stop.

Don't bother commenting on this blog, or on Facebook, if you stole the signs or wrote garbage on a political sticker. Tell the person who is reading this you and writing your comments to stop. They'll get removed the minute you post them. 

If you want to put a sign in your yard, great. If you want to gather in a parking lot and then drive down Broadway honking and waving flags, super duper. If you want to park around Washington Park and jump up and down and tell us how great your guy is, good for you. I won't be around but I have no problem with it. 

The beauty of living in a free country is that you have freedom. Your freedom ends when it harms someone else or their property so be careful. Especially around Sheryl... she's had enough of your stupidity.

This is an election year! Go out and support your party and your candidate. But don't cross the line, and don't tell me who to vote for or why. Otherwise, you will be sentenced to laughing for five minutes every day until you cheer up.

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