The guitar addict

HELLO. MY NAME is Rodney. I am a guitar addict. I have too many guitars. And I want more. Please, somebody - help me!

I just counted, and there are 11 guitars. Eleven! That's probably seven or eight too many. Well, six. Fine. FIVE. I'm working on it, people.

I actually sold one not long ago and I would like to sell a couple more. I have five acoustic guitars and six electric guitars. Call me at the store (217 223-8008) for more info. They are priced to sell, believe me.

Don't need it. Really. Honest.

A couple of days ago our Gretsch rep, Dan, came by to check on us and see if we needed anything. Silly, silly Dan! We are getting ready for Christmas, believe it or not, so there are things Second String Music may or may not "need."  But for me, personally, it comes down to the "need versus want" approach. Dan is an enabler and bad for my addiction. This is why I love him so much, of course.

Dan casually mentioned he might have a Charvel guitar or two to demonstrate the next time he swings by. Ugh. Charvel? What average guitars they make, right? No way I could ever want to strum one or two of those. OK, fine, three or four. Dan, bring 'em by the next time you are in town. I make no promises I will buy one or two.

What's that? You might have a deal going on? You might have a demo model you can sell for a lot less than normal?

Dan, Dan, Dan. I don't need another guitar. Let me repeat ... I don't need another guitar. I almost shouted that out in all caps but I'm trying to stay calm.

I especially don't need the new Charvel Pro-Mod DK4 HSH 2PT CM. Right, especially that one. You know, the satin orange guitar with 24 frets, speedy maple neck, a single coil pickup in the middle (all Seymour Duncans of course). Right. That one. Couldn't care less about it, so don't bother to bring it the next time you swing by, unless you just want me to give you my opinion.

Dan, you enabler you. Right to the gut, you punch me. I am powerless to resist, and you know it.