Kanye, come get Pepper Sprayed

APPARENTLY THERE IS a big flap about a rapper who is doing a song with Paul McCartney. His name in Kane or Candy Korn or Kan Do or something. Apparently he makes country singers cry and thinks highly of himself. I wouldn't know, because I'm not on Twitter. My loss, I guess.

Fans of this rapper are applauding him and saying it's great he's giving an unknown artist like Paul McCartney some exposure. Ah, exposure. It's what we all live for, you know?

Sir Paul McCartney

I actually saw Kan Me play, if you can call it playing. He opened up for U2 in St. Louis a few years back. Except for his CD skipping and the bass blowing out the PA, it was fine, for the five minutes I endured. I give Bono and his boys a lot of credit for helping out a poor unknown rap dude.

So. Kanye. I am all about exposure, and since you are so gracious to help out a guy like Paul (I mean, it isn't like he has done anything musically at all, ever), well, our band Pepper Spray would like to reach out to you.

We have a couple of gigs coming up. We'd love to have you "play" with us. It would be great exposure, you know, and we are all about supporting unknown artists who are struggling to make a name for themselves.

Even if it's Kan dy.