Wednesday, November 29, 2017

Scooping for Tucker

SHERYL TOOK TUCKER, our beloved Border Collie rescue, to the vet this morning. He’s been wheezing and pooping in the house lately. The vet checked him out and said he has allergies and a heart murmur. A heart murmur?

Tucker runs like the wind and appears to be his normal high strung and loving self. We love our dogs but we are not in a position financially to be doing doggie heart surgery. We have faith Tucker will be just fine. Unless he poops in the living room again.

My job is to collect a “sample” so the vet can check for worms. This is a polite and medically approved way of saying I am bringing the vet a bag of Tucker’s shit. We clean up Metric tons of dog poop from the yard every week, so it’s no big deal. I can do it. I have experience in the fecal matters.

It’s not as simple as you might think. Tucker does what we call the Tuck A Dump, where he walks and poops at the same time. It takes balance and patience to Tuck A Dump and his poop gets scattered over a wide area so you gotta watch him the whole time.

So Tucker is on steroids for his allergies, I will develop a heart murmur when I see the vet bill, and soon I’ll be delivering a bag of poop to the vet. Hopefully Tucker feels better soon. It’s all part of having kids. Er, dogs.

Where are my poop bags, anyway?

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